Friday, March 27, 2009

Testing time

God's dreams for me are so big, more than I can imagine. and yet I am so incredibly excited by the idea of being allowed to step into the manifestation of these dreams. I so want to do my part to be ready & prepared to be available to God. Psalm 139:23-24 (my paraphrase) Search me and know me Lord, know my heart, try me (test me to Your approval), know my thoughts and worries, see if there is any wicked way (show me so I can turn from it) in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Searching me is to show me who I am that is not lined up with You--the areas of my life that I have not faith in or conformed to Your character. Show me the wickedness in me. Put me through times of testing & trial so I can begin to understand and see these areas where I am not allowing You in. Show me where my heart really is and help me, through the trials, to line up more with You, so that I can follow You in the way, on the path, that You have designed for me.

It is humbling to realize that God desires to have each of us on His path and will search us and show us who we are if we will just allow Him to, if we will choose to let Him in and choose to let Him test our character so we can be conformed to Him. And He can fully use the gifts He has designed into each of us when we are fully committed to being conformed to His image, His character.

Lord, You are testing me and showing me who I am and areas of my life that are not conformed to You. It is not always easy or pleasant, pretty much never is, but I wouldn't miss it for the world. Continue to show me areas of my character that need refinement so I can be fully ready to do the work You have designed for me, can be fully conformed to Your character, Your image. Make me more like Jesus. Help "me" to decrease so YOU increase. I want nothing of "me" seen, only Your love & grace & mercy and character.

2 comments:

  1. Miss Tori~I love your heart, but even more, I love your courage and how you allow God to do the digging around, uprooting & then loving, the way He knows best. Praying with you that He will give you a double portion of His grace to bring you to where He wants you to be. What a privelge to call you friend-I love the ones who run after Him with all that they are, never looking back. This is you. . .

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  2. I am so right there with you sister. I am walking in your shoes too. Maybe not as well but I am also allowing the Lord to dig in my heart and let him show me things. Your right never pretty but always good. Clearing the garden of our hearts so he may plant new seeds and spring forth new fruits. Harvest time will come it always does but this is the best time of being. The ground being prepared leaves us in his hands. It's is the best place to be. I pray that your garden bloom in beauty and splendar the way it was meant to. You are his favorite ya know!

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